September 17, 2020

Can I Get a Little Help?

Man, I hate asking for help! Don't you? Especially, this year. It seems like in 2020, we are all working as hard as humanly possible to both blame each other for everything and not bother anyone for anything.

Last month a hacker took over my website. I was not special, thousands of sites including were all hit on the same weekend. Still, my website was my problem to solve. I'm not a computer wiz by any stretch of the imagination and this website took my months to build. So when someone hijacked my website, I tried some really basic things I knew but was quickly out of my depth.

I hated doing it but I had to ask for help... I took about three days but I eventually got my website up and running again. But after that and one other issue that I needed help with I started to wonder why it was so difficult to ask other people for help.

Vulnerability. Yuck.

Well, for one thing it made me feel vulnerable to admit that I couldn't do it myself. There was a part of my that stubbornly insisted that if I could build it, I could fix it. Wrong.

I realized I didn't want to bother anyone. I didn't want to take up space and be a nuisance to someone else. When I finally worked up the nerve to ask for what I needed, it took the person an eye-rolling fifteen minutes to sort out the issue.

Sweet Relief.

After getting over the yuck of needing the aid of another person I immediately felt better. So why had I agonized over asking for what I clearly needed? Probably because I don't like to admit I can't do things. I don't like to admit that I can't do it all on my own. But I can't and I'm not meant to.

None of us are. Big and small, we don't have to do it all on our own. Since then, I have been working hard to think about what I need help with and to practice asking.

If you are worried about asking the wrong person for help... I get it. I have absolutely sought support from people I wished in hindsight I could have avoided. The truth is some mistakes are just inevitable. Whether we trust the wrong friend, hire the wrong person for the job, date the wrong person, doesn't really matter. The step you took for yourself in asking is important. On the rare occasion you make a mistake, you can fix it. There are almost not mistakes we can't repair. Agonizing over doing it all on your own just doesn't need to be one of the mistakes you make.

As always, I’m here.  If you are ready to work on having the life you want, call me and let’s get started!

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