We talk about this is one shape or another a lot... What are our obligations to ourselves?
Self Talk
I think this shows up a lot in how we speak ourselves in particular. Do you tell yourself you “deserve” good treatment or poor? How do you speak to yourself? A lot of us speak to ourselves in a way that we would absolutely never speak to other people. And that’s a problem.
You will never spend as much time with anyone else as you do with yourself. If you are constantly negative, nasty or disrespectful to yourself, of course that is going to have an impact on your
behavior.
So you your first obligation is to speak to yourself (or at least endeavor to) as though you would a friend; kindness, respect, honesty. If you speak to yourself with judgment and shame, you are also far more likely to speak to and think of others this way.
Action
Another obligation to yourself is action. What do you want from life? I don’t care about what others want you to do or what you think is the right thing to do…
If the would ends today, what would you be happiest about in life? What did you accomplish? What did you learn? What did you experience that you are grateful for?
If you aren’t sure, that is something to take a look at. If you feel like there is a list but you would like it to be longer, then make that list and figure out how to get there. We are only offered so many journeys around the sun and it is our job (because no one could or would do it for us) to make it what we want it to be.
Step one: What do you want from life?
Step two: How do you get there?
Self talk + Action
They way you speak to yourself will absolutely impact weather or not you are able to take action. If you tell yourself you aren’t good enough or smart of enough or WHATEVER enough then you will self sabotage and will not get what you most wanted from life.
If you are having a difficult time getting these two obligations to yourself worked out, ask for help! Do you need a therapist, a coach, a friend?! We all need a team, is it time to assemble yours?